Julian Barnes 
Hygiene (Storycuts) 

Major ”Jacko” Jackson, now retired, takes his yearly, self-appointed furlough to London. But time has moved on, and the kitchenware on the itemised task list his wife has provided him with is not the only thing he finds out of stock.
Part of the Storycuts series, this short story was previously published in the collection The Lemon Table.